Always Worth It

The day began with pancakes, singing and cards from all my men. This day that bears the name of so many women all over the world. Mothers Day, a celebration of the women that have had profound impact on our lives in various ways and for so many reasons. It is also a day that many say, "A day just for me!" I am sure that in some way we all feel an aspect of this thought.

This year, Mother's Day was not exactly what I had in mind. Not because anyone was trying to make it about other things but because, just as life happens, something else had to get done on Sunday. Honestly, I had something in mind that I really wanted to do that I thought would make the day great, but I was given the opportunity to practically live out my role as a wife and mother. I'm not always great at giving up what I want and it was a little hard on this day especially, but it all came down to my choice to surrender or hold on tight.

To be sacrificing for those that I love and choose to spend my life investing in each day. Although it seemed as though the day should be just what I wanted, it was also a day that was being used to help push me to grow. I said to Mr. Wonderful, "Anytime I have the opportunity to be more Christ-like, it's always worth it.....right?" He grins that grin that got me from the start and I know. I know that this stretching will be worth it.

As I look back on the day, I had so many blessings that made it special in it's own way.

The smiles on mothers faces as they carried roses given to them by their children at church

Watching my little men watch big trucks in action

Ice cream running down chubby fingers

Watching him (mr. wonderful) do what he is so good at....encouraging and teaching

Boys at play, free to run and climb, splashing in the pool

Salmon and asparagus

A quiet moment with mr. wonderful

On the Horizon

It's ten o'clock in the morning and the phone rings. I know who is at the other end of the phone, because he is there every morning at this time. He (my mr. wonderful) calls to check-in and see how the day is going so far. He always asks how my quiet time was, how the boys are doing and what are plans are for the rest of the day. It's nice. It keeps us connected. I like it because I don't feel alone, which can sometimes happen in this crazy state called motherhood.

On this particular day I say hi and he says how's it going? "It's like groundhogs day around here!" I can "hear" him grinning at me. He probes more and I finally respond by saying, "You know this is the hardest job ever, right?!?!?!" Yes, he calmly says. My rock. My steady leader guiding me in my moments when the whole universe seems a little off kilter. He is my gift and this calmness the greatest gift of love he offers me every day.

My heart is so heavy with this groundhogs day feeling. I have been aware of changes that this home needs to make, the promptings of my Heavenly Father who is calling us to something greater, something different than what happens each day here and now. Do you know how hard it is to change the routine, habits and regular happenings of five very different people in one house? Yes, I know you know this difficulty. I find it most challenging, because it begins in me.

Honestly, though, isn't that where it should all begin? In my heart, my thinking, my words, my actions....my life. I cannot guide the young hearts in my care if my own heart is not in a state of obedience to my Heavenly Father. So the journey begins....

This journey is but another season of life. I love to think of life in seasons, because it reminds me that there is a beginning and an end and nothing lasts forever here on earth. So I welcome the bitter cold winter that will strip me bare of all that I consider comfortable in order to reveal the true condition of my heart. Much like God allowed in the life of his faithful servant Job. God knew that under the circumstances that he allowed Job to endure, the sin of pride would rear it's ugly head and Job would be opened to the need for that to change. At the end of his suffering he came out more like the man God desired him to be and less like the man that Job thought he was doing a good job at being.

In the cold wind, my bare and exposed self will need the warmth of God to fill in the places that have become hardened to His ways. I do not intentionally seek out ways to distance myself from God, but I allow it to happen in the busyness of everyday life and responsibility.

As the sun begins to grow warmer, I begin to sprout new thoughts, attitudes and actions. Spring is on the horizon and I will again bloom. New and beautiful because of His work in me. As the winds blow gentle, the seeds begin to scatter and I am feeling refreshed and alive in the cool Spring air. I am pouring into the lives entrusted to me, changing that which He has said can be better. In the summer we thrive in the sun and flourish in our growth. We cling to the rain that falls to water our souls and then slowly, like the sun creeping up over the horizon, the rich gold, red and orange hues begin to surface.

Humbled

Last month, God was so good to me once again. You see, He has this wonderful way of carving out unexpected, non-planned time with my very dearest friend. Even when we try to spend time together and work out the scheduling of our seven children, husbands home and a time and place....it rarely actually comes together in the end. But then on a random Sunday afternoon, we will both show up in a place for one thing and end up having a precious hour of time just for ourselves. God is really cool like that! :)

So last month, this happened and as we shared our hearts with one another, we both were having the same thoughts about the level of commitment needed for the wifely & motherly duties God has asked of us. Then in a class I am taking our teacher shared that it is has always been her goal to find ways to meet the needs and build in life to her husband and children. However, that is not something that she looks for them to do for her. No~ she goes to God for that. He alone provides what she needs. Now of course her husband and children bless her in many ways and build life into her, but she is not actively seeking that from them.

In our world today, this whole idea is completely backwards and so much negative light is shed on this idea of servanthood in our own homes. But, that is exactly where God calls us to serve first. And it is also where we find our joy and purpose. It also means that we must surrender our way and wants in marriage and motherhood and replace them with God's intended desire for these roles. Trust Him~ He will provide and take care of all that you truly need. And as you seek Him fervantly, He will mold what you want into that which He knows is best for you.

This is my prayer this next year~ that God will make me more selfless and more serving. That I will be in tune to the hearts of my inner circle, as well as those I come in contact with, in order to build life and meet their needs on a practical level. I was reading a blog I enjoy once in awhile and she had this beautiful post that spoke directly to this topic, so take a minute and go visit Joy. Let this story of the woman who "has no name" encourage you and challenge you in this mission of truly serving selflessly.

Out of the mouth of babes...

I have always called Wesley "my Mr. wonderful"~ yes it may be cheesy, but it just came out one day in a sincere way and it has stuck. So when Wesley comes home, we are making something for him or Eli is writing him a card he refers to him as "our wonderful daddy." I am sure this has been influenced from my calling him "my Mr. wonderful" for as long as Eli has been around!

Which of course, then led me to think about all that comes out of my mouth and how my boys use what they hear~ for example:

"Now Mommy, please don't get fussy with me; Evan was crying and needed to be walk-holded." (Luke)

"Well, actually....." (used for many things by Eli)

"Sanctification only happens through Jesus" (Eli)

"Now Eli, we don't say never because we have to try!" (Luke)

"Well, we will all be in heaven, except for Luke~ we need to pray for him to give his heart to Jesus." "And our baby, because Evan was born with a black heart." (Eli)

"Mommy, is God bigger than the sky?" (Yes, baby He is) "Oh right, he's omnis....oh you know...I can't remember... what is that word?" (Luke)

"Mommy, you have to have the verse in your heart, so you can whip it out and shoot the enemy!" (Eli)

"Eli, what were you asked to do?" (Luke)

"Who do I smell so beautiful back here?" (Luke)

"You need to be on God's team, not Satan's team." (Eli)

So this kind of thinking naturally led me to focus more on what I was saying and how I was imparting life with my words. Being a mama has moments where I have to take many deep breaths before I speak. A very dear friend of mine was talking about how she was really working on keeping her tone and inflection the same with her children. She made such an important point that her children needed to obey right away to the same voice all the time. So very true!

They also need to hear the kind of speech that you want them to use, because what they hear is what they will say! We all know how very true this is! :) So my challenge to all of us is to be intentional is using words that impart life, encourage and build up those around us.

Luke 6:45 says, "The good person out of the good treasure of his heart produces good, and the evil person out of his evil treasure produces evil, for out of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaks."

For His Purpose Alone

I recently mentioned in this post that God was at work in my heart about staying home full-time. In the previous mentioned post I wrote about trusting God, because having me work less really doesn't sound like a good idea in today's world. But, at the same time I also knew that He would make a way, because this was His desire for me.

Well, I didn't mention this before, but this has been my hearts desire ever since our oldest was born nearly 5 1/2 years ago. I love to be home, I love home-making and taking care of my husband and children. I really have not liked having my day end by 3:00pm each afternoon in order to go to work and find care for the boys and the list goes on.

So, deep in my heart saying "yes" to God really wasn't that hard for me, but circumstances made it seem more difficult. Now, fast forward one month and here we are today. What has God done?

He freed up our finances in such a way that I do not need to work~ Yes, amazing I know. I can most often be found still speechless. This morning I was talking to God and listening and He made it so evidently clear that yes, this was a desire of my heart, but He had done all of this for His purpose alone.

He made the path so clear, so brightly lit with neon lights for me to be home 100%, I can say, "Only by the hand of God." You see in the midst of HIS great plan, He also found a way to encourage the deepest part of my heart and remove a source of stress to me. He found a way to gently lead me directly down the path He intends for me to be walking.

And you know the most beautiful part of it to me is that He has rendered my heart speechless, except for the song of praise I have continually sung since the day He did this amazing work on our behalf. Do you remember me saying recently in this post that God always gives us what we don't deserve? Well, that is exactly the kind of God I serve and I am humbled that He would work in such a detailed way to bring about HIS purposes in my life while also blessing me beyond what I could imagine.

Thank you God for showing me that this was not about me, but it was all about You! You are not concerned that I am comfortable (so to speak) or that I get all I would like to have in life, rather you are concerned with the state of my heart. You are also concerned with my focus being on doing that which matters most to You! What is really amazing is that when You choose, You are capable of setting me firmly on the path You desire, while also making my joy complete in You alone. Thank you, I do not have the words....

NewLens Challenge: Days 30-32

Wow! We are coming into the final days of our 32-Day New Lens Challenge! So, we put checks in our check boxes and it is soon back to regular 'ole days and the same old, same old....

Wait a minute! This challenge was meant to actually change us, right? Yes, us, not them or him, but us. I changed. Did you? What was the most significant change you can see since 32 days ago?

The challenge may be "ending" but it is absolutely just a new beginning. Now, we have a new lens to look through and we will not be doing things the same way~

Day 30-32 Open up God's word and go to 1 Corinthians 13:4-13 and read this out loud. Now go back and put your name every place it says "love." Write this verse down with your name in the place of love and post it somewhere to see through-out your day. At the end of the day, circle the ones that were challenging to you. The next day do the same thing, only circle in a different color and the same for Day 32.

I love the verse 11 which says, "When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I gave up childish ways. "

Where God's word is abiding, it is changing! So, has it changed you?

Keep this verse posted for the next 30 days and continue changing. Let God's love permeate the deepest parts of your soul in such a way, that you don't know any other way to love! Thank Him for doing a work in you and ask Him to continue His chiseling and refining~ for this is the place where we are brought into His beauty and used to make a difference in the lives of those around us! Thanks for walking through this challenge with me. It was encouraging to think of other women out there working hard to build up their families at the same time. God bless,

Melissa

NewLens Challenge: Days 28 & 29

Proverbs 31:12 She does him good, and not harm, all the days of her life.

Day 28 Set aside time to be in prayer for your intimate relationship with your husband. The bond that is shared in marriage is so incredibly vulnerable and honest, our attitudes must be in the right place! Now, set aside some time to build your intimate relationship and pursue your husband in that way. This is a great need for our husbands, that they are so often "on guard" against in today's world. There is so much tempation all around. Let us be a warm and inviting place where they can share such a beautiful level of intimacy that only God could create between a man and a woman.

Day 29 OK....remember the verses we found about GOD being "all the we need." Time to share with our husband and ask forgiveness, if needed, for unspoken and unfair expectations that we have put upon him. Don't be hesitant or shy, but let your husband know that God faithfully supplies all that you need and you do not want your husband to feel the pressure of "being all." Find ways in this conversation to thank your husband for all that he does provide!

Motherhood

Day 28 Sit down with your child and make a fun acrostic poem using their name. Then use words that describe them (ex: helpful, gentle, etc...) Let them know what you love about them!

Day 29 If you have not done so already, take your children on their "date night" and just enjoy them. :)

NewLens Challenge: Days 22-27

Hello Ladies! Wow, this was a tough week for me~ We have been working on a project at our church, that has consumed me for the past two weeks and this week I was on guard, up against many attacks. I am sorry I did not post Friday night for the weekend, I pray that you found a special way to honor your husband and children yesterday! This last week is really an inward focus for ourselves and I know it is going to be challenging, but also I pray have a profound impact on our hearts!

As you go through the week, find your own ways to:
1. Honor your husband
2. Be intentional with your children

Please comment with your ideas! I would really love to hear how you personally found ways to build life into your family. I will be looking forward to hearing what God has done in your heart~

You know your family better than anyone and remember, NO ONE CAN DO FOR THEM WHAT YOU CAN DO FOR THEM! Make a list as you go through the week and maybe even look back through this challenge at what you have already done. Does something stand out that really impacted your husband or children, act on that and bless them again! They will tell you by words or actions what encourages and builds them up!

Marriage

Day 22 to Day 27 Purpose to set aside each day to be in prayer about your attitude and "unspoken" expectations that you have put on your husband. Open God's word each day for the next six days and find a scripture that reveals to your heart what God is to you. Our husbands are not meant to "be all" and "provide all" we need and /or desire, but our Heavenly Father is! Draw near to Him and He will meet you where you are. Somehow, record each verse and pray that verse through-out your day.

(Also, be working on planning a "date night." Keep your husband in mind when planning. Even if it means later after all the children have gone to bed if you can't afford to go out somewhere. Plan something very special just for the two of you to enjoy!)

Motherhood

Day 22 to Day 27 For your children, first lay aside your dreams and expectations for them and let God fill your heart will pure intentions on their behalf. Yes, we all have the best intentions when dealing with our children, but it is hard as parents not to sometimes try and "mold" them ourselves. And that...is GOD'S job! So release your children fully to God and find scripture to encourage you in viewing them solely through God's lens. What does God say about children? What verse(s) is He revealing to you concerning your child(ren)? Record the verses you find. Then find sometime to share with your children what God says about them. Let them know that what God says matters to you and you are going to trust in God's orginal design of them~ letting Him bring to completion all that is possible in each of them.

(Plan a special "date night" with each of your children. This may need to happen over the next couple of weeks, depending on the number of children you have. Plan something fun to do to have special time to invest one-on-one.)

Have a wonderful week!

NewLens Challenge: Days 17-21

Proverbs 31:10-12 An excellent wife who can find? She is far more precious than jewels. The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he will have no lack of gain. She does him good, and not harm, all the days of her life.

Marriage

Day 17 Today our goal is to not argue or "go against" what our husband says or does. I do not mean this in a doormat sense, but a much more valuable sense in that we are working to build in leadership to our husbands. Without even thinking we can often be discouraging with our words or questions, so let us keep quiet and think much before we speak much.

Day 18 Do you have a decision to make? Seek your husband's guidance. This may be something you already do, so maybe find something that isn't BIG and ask him what he thinks would be best for you to do. Our husbands feel respected and trusted when we express that we value their opinion of how we spend our time.

Day 19 Ask your husband what he would like you to accomplish with the children today? Is there a project you can all work on to help him at the house, a verse he would like them to learn, something he has been asking you do? Maybe it is even find out about registration for t-ball. Just purpose to seek his parental leadership and follow-through.

Day 20 If it's possible, plan to take lunch for your husband at his workplace today and have the kids make special cards for him. Be a winsome example of a wife who honors and does her husband good. This is not to be prideful, but to publically show your love for him. This gives others the opportunity to witness God at work in a marriage relationship, because they see something that looks different from what the world offers. If not, then plan a special meal for him and still have cards ready!

Day 21 Find 6 different times today to say, "I love you for....." (Example: I love you for working hard to provide for us. I love you for taking time to spend with our children.)

Proverbs 31:26-28 She opens her mouth with wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue. She looks well to the ways of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. Her children rise up and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her:

Motherhood

Day 17 Find a new way to say "no"....meaning, try not to say "NO" to your kids toda. I realize this is difficult, but even if you just pick 1 or 2 things you usually just say "no" to it will be great! (Example: "No, we are not going on a bike ride right now." Exchanged for: "I know that a bike ride would be so fun. Right now, we need to focus on our chores and rest time. We will see if we have time later this afternoon.") I really feel that this helps validate our children's desires as important. We do want them to know that their ideas are important to us, but we must communicate that to them!

Day 18 Purpose to not say "just a minute" to your children. Our goal is not to make our home child-centered, but not to appear too busy or distracted to meet their needs. Most things seem urgent to the small child, so help them feel that they are important to you, by addressing things as quickly as possible. They will see our willingness and feel a certain kind of love in having you not put them off. This take good judgement on our part. I am not saying drop everything, but at least find a proactive way to have them wait. (Yes, let me put this one dish away.) (Honey, I would love to come right away, can you use your words and tell me why, I am in the middle of making dinner) Take some time with older children to ask them about something specific they would like your help with or would like help in accomplishing over the next week or so.

Day 19 Make applesause with your kids today and color it a fun color! Here is a simple recipe.

Day 20 Talk to your children about how dad is the head of the home and why you are taking lunch or making cards for him. Ask them what they love most about daddy and write some of those things down on their cards. Build into your children a high respect for dad's leadership. If you have older children perhaps they can write a note to thank their dad for his leadership in some way they are appreciative.

Day 21 Get a piece of paper and some stickers, then let your kids know you are on the hunt for acts of kindness today. Each time you see one, you will stick a sticker on the page. Let them know the goal is to fill up the whole page! Maybe even draw a heart and fill up the heart. Share with them that kindness comes from the heart and is really wanting what is best for someone else. You share or do something that will benefit them more than yourself. And, that your heart is very happy when it is kind! Challenge older children to find ways to purpose to be kind today to the their siblings, a friend or family.

NewLens Challenge: Days 15 & 16

We have made it halfway ladies! I pray that this challenge is becoming more natural and you are finding true joy in encouraging and loving your husband and children through God's lens! For this weekend, the Sunday challenge is one for the whole family to take part in together~ Have a blessed weekend :)

Marriage

Day 15 Ask your husband for sometime to pray for him. Spend a little time searching his heart (letting God lead your words/questions) and then pray for him about those things he shares. Don't forget to pray for perseverence to reach those goals he shared with you earlier in the week. If you are unable to actually pray with him, then set aside at least 15 mins to pray for him.

Motherhood

Day 15 Kneel beside your child's bed with them and pray with them and for them. Ask them about some things they would like to talk to God about, then model talking to God like He is right there with you.

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Day 16 Plan a family movie or board game night. OR if your husband enjoys doing something else as a family that you are able to do, then plan time for that! Turn off the phone and let your family know that you are "all theirs" for the night. Maybe even have some fun things for supper like popcorn, pancakes, waffles.... you can think of something fun! Enjoy one another and pray together as a family, thanking God that He has put you all together as a part of His perfect plan and purpose!

NewLens Challenge: Days 10-14

Proverbs 14:1 "The wise woman builds her home, but the foolish tears it down with her own hands."

Marriage

Day 10 When your husband comes home today from work, refrain from complaining about your day. Focus on all the good things that took place and let him know the best part was him coming home!

Day 11 Take some time tonight to sit down with your husband and ask him what are some of his goals/dreams. Ask him what you can do to help him over time to accomplish them.

Day 12 Make your husbands favorite dessert for supper tonight.

Day 13 We often start "filling the room" with talking when our husband's come home from work. Work hard today to set up your house to be full of excitement (my boys go crazy with happiness!)when Daddy gets home, but then quiet for him to just be able to relax.

Day 14 Do you remember what first attracted you to your husband? Let him know!

Motherhood

Day 10 Find at least three times today to let your child know, "I am commited to you!" Tell them that this means you are always doing what is best for them based on what God asks you to do.

Day 11 Sit down with your kids and write a fun story to share tonight at supper! Start the sentences and let them fill in words once-in-awhile. (Ex: Once upon a time, there was a __________ and it decided to take a ride in a ___________) This promises, lot of laughs! Enjoy~

Day 12 Make your child's favorite cookies today! (You are already baking :) ) If you have more than one child, cutout cookies can be fun~

Day 13 Play a board game with your children today.

Day 14 Find time to sit with each child today and just let them talk! If they are not big talkers, sing songs with them or read a favorite book.

NewLens Challenge: Days 8 & 9

How are you doing? I pray that this past week has been encouraging to your heart and your home! If you are new to this, don't worry or be hard on yourself, change takes time and grace is available for the process~ thank you, Jesus! I also wanted to share something that has been on my heart. If you are unable to actually do these things for your husband or children (there are number of reasons why this might be) then I encourage you to keep a notebook for them, pray these things for them and pray about when you may be able to share with them. The most important part to remember is that although it benefits our family, it is really about changing our heart and attitude toward them! A sweet reminder God reveals to me each day I journey as a wife and mother~

Have a wonderful weekend!

Marriage

Day 8 Buy a small notebook, make a cute book or just grap some notebook paper and staple it together! Whatever your style, get a book to start writing love letters to your husband :) My husband recently bought this book, and although I have not read it yet, I am looking forward to it! The art of handwritten notes is almost lost, so revive this art, as well as all the reasons why you first fell in love with your husband, and let him know! If your husband is willing, you can invite him to write in it also, and pass it back and forth between the two of you! See how long you can keep this expression of love growing over time~ (I bought my little book at the right at Archiver's for about 4.99)

Day 9 At Sunday lunch, share with everyone what you love about your husband and why you are grateful that God placed him as the leader of your home.

Motherhood

Day 8 Make a fun page of "7" things I love about you on this day! Sit down and read it to your child, then find a special place to keep it for them. Purpose to randomly do this on a different day each month, using the date for the number of things you love! Don't worry about the "artistry" of the page, just make it fun for your child. Keep them in mind and use things/colors that they love :)










Day 9 At Sunday lunch, share with everyone why you are so grateful to God that you are "your child's name" mommy! Thank them for the special kind of joy they bring to your family.

What fruit do you see in your home today?

On Wednesday, the boys and I went to the store and bought some fruit stickers and green and brown "fun" paper. What, might you be asking, was all this for? Well....

Our new "Fruit of the Spirit" tree that is growing in our kitchen.

I started the process of teaching the fruits of the Spirit with chart that had movable pieces of fruit. There was white column and a red column side by side. When we did not display a certain fruit, it had to be moved to the red column and then they would sit in our "Think About" chair for the number of minutes of their age. At the times end I would talk with them and pray with them about how we can better show that fruit of the Spirit.

But, I was seeing that we were needing more help in the practical part of how this looks in our home, our relationships and attitudes, so God gave me this idea!

When Mommy or Daddy sees a "fruit" we thank our son for displaying this in whatever the situation and then they get to put some fruit on our tree! It has been fun and for my boys a Big incentive to follow-through on the action of living out the fruits of the Spirit!

If you want to try this in your home, I would love to see your trees and hear about how it is working for you:)
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On a completely different note.... I am not really into character clothing or shoes that light up. So, one might ask "why in the world is Luke wearing these?"

Well, yesterday we went looking for some spring/summer sandals and found these on sale for $5 and we could not help ourselves! Luke fell totally in love with them and Mommy could not resist this sweet face....

This morning the sweet child woke up and ran to give me hugs, then said "Excuse me mommy, I need to go see if my Lightening shoes slept good." He then asked me if he could take them outside for a walk! Pure happiness for this sweet boy and that my dear friends is why I bought the shoes! :)

Through a New Lens: Challenge Days 3-7

"Whatever you do, whether than you eat or drink; or whatever you do, do all for the glory of God." 1 Corinthians 10:31

Marriage

Day 3~ Write a list of 5 things you see that your husband does very well. Tonight when he gets home, choose one and thank him. Don't rush it, but find a time to really be able to look him in the eyes and let him know you are grateful. (Keep the list and thank him for the other 4, sometime in the next month)

Day 4~ Find a verse that you want to pray for your husband, write it on a notecard and tape it somewhere for him to find today. Remember to pray for him!

Day 5~ Ask your husband to share something that you could do for him today, that would be helpful to him. Purpose to get it done!

Day 6~ Call your husband, just to say "I love you and I'm proud of how hard you work to provide for our family."

Day 7~ Set aside an hour tonight for your husband to do something he really enjoys. Even if it does not include you, just let him enjoy some quiet time of his own. (with a joyful spirit!)



Motherhood


Day 3~ Ask each child what makes the feel loved and purpose to express that kind of love to them today.

Day 4~ Have something fun planned for breakfast, maybe even something your children request, but you don't make too often.

Day 5~ Set aside 30mins to 1 hour to do what your children want to do! Don't answer the phone or any other distractions, just "be" with them.

Day 6~ Find time to speak to each of your children individually today and let them know how you see progress in them. Thank them for making good choices that honor God.

Day 7~ Spend 30 minutes today reading silly books with your children! Enjoy and laugh with them.

Through a New Lens: Challenge Days 1 & 2

Just a little housekeeping~ I will post a weekend challenge and a week challenge. It is not realistic for me to post every day, so get out your calendar or weekly planner and write down the challenge for each day. I will post on Friday night for the weekend and Sunday night for the week. (If you are new, please read about this challenge here and here.

First, my prayer for each of you choosing to take on this challenge:

Father, I ask that you might reach down and deeply touch the heart of each of us, as we journey through the next 32 days. This will not always be easy and we may not see results right away, so help us to fully trust in You and Your perfect timing. When we fail, guide us back to the track and help us to keep moving forward and not stay there in that place of feeling defeated. Thank you for intimately knowing each of us; reveal to each heart what You want me doing for the good of my husband and children. May our motive be to honor You and not to gain anything for ourselves. Give us the eyes to see this place we are in as "holy" ground, doing work for Your kingdom. For you are ever-close to us and our life is for the greatness of You, not ourselves.

Day 1~ Acts 3:19-20 Repent therefore, and turn again, that your sins may be blotted out, that times of refreshing may come from the presence of the Lord, and that he may send the Christ appointed for you, Jesus

Start on your knees before the Lord and cry out to Him. Be honest before your Holy God and let Him wash you. Wash away the fears, the doubt and guilt...whatever need to be cleaned out. Cry out for Him to empty you of yourself, so that you do not get in the way of what He wants to do in you. Be quiet before Him and listen.

Day 2~ Psalm 19:14 Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in your sight, O LORD, my rock and my redeemer.

Let this be your prayer today. Pray for your Holy God to do such a work in your heart that your words and thoughts are aligned with Him constantly. "take every thought captive to the obedience of Christ" This challenge begins with prayer, because that is where the power lies! It is not in and of ourselves just being able to start a new routine or change our minds about doing "life" differently. The kind of change I am praying for, only happens at deep heart level.

Pray that this will not be a shallow attempt to spend a month encouraging your family, but rather that it will be the beginning of a new way of doing life. Closer to your Heavenly Father, more obedient to His daily direction and aligned with His purpose and will for your life every step of the journey.

Psalm 28:7 The LORD is my strength and my shield; in him my heart trusts, and I am helped; my heart exults, and with my song I give thanks to him.

Praise God that He is your Source! Give thanks for this place He has placed you, for He knows what He is doing and you can trust Him! Thank you Lord~

Through the lens of God: Motherhood

I stopped and sighed. "Why dear Lord, does this precious child insist on taking every book out of the rack? I really do not have the energy to help him pick it all up, again!"
Do you have moments like this? If you are a mother, I am going to guess that this occurs at least twice a day if not more, depending on the age of your precious blessings! So, what am I learning about raising my sweet, charging, strong boys?

Motherhood~ "No one can do for them, what I can do for them!" Are you surprised to find the same statement made about motherhood that I made about marriage? Well, it is true. So, I must ask again, what am I doing for them?

I was chosen to be their mama and although honestly there are tough days where I am sure God mixed my name up with someone else's, it does not diminsh the fact that indeed I was equiped to be their mama, not anyone else!

In her book, The Mission of Motherhood, Sally Clarkson so beautifully states, "children, by nature, are designed to take up our time. We develop the heart of our children by spending time with them, just as Jesus spent time with his disciples. He not only taught them truth but also practical application. Jesus invested in them and gave them his whole life."

And so it is also my calling to invest my whole life into them. Motherhood has gotten a very skewed modern-day vision placed upon it. I don't need to list the many things said about motherhood these days, I know that you can already think of many. So, instead I will ask this question, "Where do you stand on the debate?" This is where God says we should stand: on the side of yielding. Not half-heartedly, but whole-heartedly to the vision He gives us for motherhood, because His original idea works and it is also the path to much joy, contentment and peace.

Now those may not be the first three words that come to every mother's mind when she thinks about the highchair that is dirty again, the laundry that never makes it to the drawers, the potty-training 3 year old, the homeschool papers to be graded, the whining that needs to be dealt with at the heart level. No these "things/circumstances" do not seem to be high joy-producing circumstances, but I am going to be brave and say that is because our focus and lens is skewed.

Clarkson also states in her book that every act of disobedience and foolishness is an opportunity to point our children to their need of a Savior. It is my opportunity to train their hearts and minds in righteousness. Wow! Now, do you think that is how God looks at my foolishness? As an opportunity? To be honest, I cannot think of a time that I heard from heaven, "Melissa~ do you understand what I am telling you? Why on earth would you do that again?" No, I feel the tug at my heart and hear the call of my Father to be still and get back on track. That gentle and loving way that He has when disciplining His children, those whom He calls His heirs.

Whatever vision of motherhood I have, I need to leave it behind and get into God's word to see what He says it should look like. Then I have to "clean house" and get busy about being the kind of mother that builds life into her children and says, "Thank you Lord that my precious child has a desire to read and learn! Oh, my sweet boy!" The feeling I had when I rounded the corner and saw this....

The depth of my relationship with my children provides them with stability (or a lack of). They will either believe my words because they see my life authenticating them or they will know the shallow depth of my attempt at connecting with them.

Love is spelled T.I.M.E. in the eyes of a child. What else is more important than cultivating their hearts for the precious message of Christ's love for them? I simply cannot think of anything...

So, won't you join me in the 32 day challenge to grow more deeply connected with your children? Won't you take the time to invest in them like God calls us to do? Come back tomorrow to start the challenge! See you then~

Through the lens of God: Marriage

James 3:17 But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, reasonable, full of mercy and good fruits, unwavering and sincere.

gentle: those that are possessed of such a spirit are not easily provoked to anger; patiently bear, and put up with injuries; for God has a great regard to the meek, humble, and quiet souls; He lifts them up, when cast down; He causes glad tidings to be preached to them; He increases their joy in the Lord; He feeds them, when hungry, to their satisfaction; He guides them in judgment, and teaches them His ways; He will rise up in judgment for them, and reprove with equity for their sake; He gives more grace unto them, and beautifies them with salvation, and will cause them to inherit the earth. (from John Gill's Exposition of the Entire Bible)

The first time God placed this verse on my heart was about eight months before Wesley and I had a miscarrage. At the time He first gave me this verse, I knew in my heart that God wanted me to learn how to be unwavering in my faith and my follow-through each day in walking close with Him. I did not know what was ahead of me, but God did know and He was preparing me. Honestly, when we walked through that time together I was sure of my foundation and stood firm on the fact that God knew what He was doing. It was heart-breaking and difficult, but I really felt solid in the hand of God.

Ever since then, I have kept that verse very close to my heart. As God has taught me more about that trial we went through, He has continued to teach me more about the treasures found within this verse. It is applicable to so many areas of my life, because it is talking about God's wisdom, which is perfect!

God's wisdom is the light for my path each day. I know that God has placed me in this place for a purpose. I am the wife of Wesley and the mama to Eli and Luke for a reason. I was chosen by God to build life into them and invest in their lives with my whole heart. How does God ask me to live out my life as a wife and mother?

peaceable

gentle

reasonable

unwavering

sincere

full of mercy

Recently my heart has been so heavy and I have felt myself struggling with lots of thoughts, doubts, questions, etc... filling my heart and mind. I know that this kind of process is vital for me to grow and be refined, but it is difficult, because I feel like it distracts me. Through the struggles, God reveals so much to my heart and here is what He has said so loud and clear concerning marriage and motherhood.

Marriage~ "No one can do for my husband what I can do for him!" So, what am I doing for him? My attitude towards him needs to be that of pure sacrifice that is in his best interest. I need to daily look for ways to build life into him and support what God has asked Him to be doing right now with his life. This includes ministry, parenting, work, leadership, etc...

I have been more than blessed in the gift God gave me in a husband. I say that in praise to God for providing just who I needed to love me, lead me, partner with me, parent with me and be my best friend. He is very sacrificial and supportive of me, which I sometimes just stand in awe of, because I know there is so much more I could do for him.

I desire to be the kind of wife that "does him good, all the days of her life," one that knows "the heart of her husband trusts in her," and one who is "submissive and a lover of her husband." Loving my husband needs to be my top priority each day. Yes, I do believe it comes before my children, but I will be the first to admit that I know this doesn't always happen.

Having a 5 year old and a 3 year old, I am most often a bit spent at the end of the day and grateful to have my partner by my side. I am thankful that I have someone willing to be in the trenches with me, but I am not sure I always do a good job of letting him know that. My weariness often speaks first, rather that my heart of love and gratitude, as well as my pride (in a good way) in what an incredible job he does of supporting us as a family.

I am Wesley's wife and it is my responsibility alone to build into his life. So, I am taking a 32 day challenge to build him up and "do for him, what no one else can do!" Will you join me in doing this for your husband? Watch for the posts that will begin on February 28th~

I realistically know that not everyone precious woman who may read this post has a husband that is on her team, or supportive or sacrificial for her. I do not take that lightly, trust me! I take very seriously the fact that there are many marriages struggling all around me and that is a very hard place to be, I have seen it. I understand the effects and the hardship, so please know that, while it is not always easy to be in the place you are, you are never alone. God still has you and is looking for you to be faithful.

Many have heard 1 Peter 3:1-4 that talks of the wife who can win her husband over by her quiet and chaste behavior. This doesn't work because we think it is a good idea, it works because we are out of the way! I have women very dear to me who walk in hard marriages, but they also have the sweetest countenance. It may not be rewarded here on earth, but it certainly will not be overlooked in heaven, by their dear Savior!

If you are in a tough place in your marriage I encourage you all the more to take this challenge to heart and see what God can do over the next 32 days, in your heart and in your husband's. Remember that all we do is for the glory of God and that makes it all worth it!

This challenge will also include an aspect for motherhood, which I will post about tomorrow!