Thursday, February 26, 2009
Through the lens of God: Marriage
James 3:17 But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, reasonable, full of mercy and good fruits, unwavering and sincere.
gentle: those that are possessed of such a spirit are not easily provoked to anger; patiently bear, and put up with injuries; for God has a great regard to the meek, humble, and quiet souls; He lifts them up, when cast down; He causes glad tidings to be preached to them; He increases their joy in the Lord; He feeds them, when hungry, to their satisfaction; He guides them in judgment, and teaches them His ways; He will rise up in judgment for them, and reprove with equity for their sake; He gives more grace unto them, and beautifies them with salvation, and will cause them to inherit the earth. (from John Gill's Exposition of the Entire Bible)
The first time God placed this verse on my heart was about eight months before Wesley and I had a miscarrage. At the time He first gave me this verse, I knew in my heart that God wanted me to learn how to be unwavering in my faith and my follow-through each day in walking close with Him. I did not know what was ahead of me, but God did know and He was preparing me. Honestly, when we walked through that time together I was sure of my foundation and stood firm on the fact that God knew what He was doing. It was heart-breaking and difficult, but I really felt solid in the hand of God.
Ever since then, I have kept that verse very close to my heart. As God has taught me more about that trial we went through, He has continued to teach me more about the treasures found within this verse. It is applicable to so many areas of my life, because it is talking about God's wisdom, which is perfect!
God's wisdom is the light for my path each day. I know that God has placed me in this place for a purpose. I am the wife of Wesley and the mama to Eli and Luke for a reason. I was chosen by God to build life into them and invest in their lives with my whole heart. How does God ask me to live out my life as a wife and mother?
full of mercy
Recently my heart has been so heavy and I have felt myself struggling with lots of thoughts, doubts, questions, etc... filling my heart and mind. I know that this kind of process is vital for me to grow and be refined, but it is difficult, because I feel like it distracts me. Through the struggles, God reveals so much to my heart and here is what He has said so loud and clear concerning marriage and motherhood.
Marriage~ "No one can do for my husband what I can do for him!" So, what am I doing for him? My attitude towards him needs to be that of pure sacrifice that is in his best interest. I need to daily look for ways to build life into him and support what God has asked Him to be doing right now with his life. This includes ministry, parenting, work, leadership, etc...
I have been more than blessed in the gift God gave me in a husband. I say that in praise to God for providing just who I needed to love me, lead me, partner with me, parent with me and be my best friend. He is very sacrificial and supportive of me, which I sometimes just stand in awe of, because I know there is so much more I could do for him.
I desire to be the kind of wife that "does him good, all the days of her life," one that knows "the heart of her husband trusts in her," and one who is "submissive and a lover of her husband." Loving my husband needs to be my top priority each day. Yes, I do believe it comes before my children, but I will be the first to admit that I know this doesn't always happen.
Having a 5 year old and a 3 year old, I am most often a bit spent at the end of the day and grateful to have my partner by my side. I am thankful that I have someone willing to be in the trenches with me, but I am not sure I always do a good job of letting him know that. My weariness often speaks first, rather that my heart of love and gratitude, as well as my pride (in a good way) in what an incredible job he does of supporting us as a family.
I am Wesley's wife and it is my responsibility alone to build into his life. So, I am taking a 32 day challenge to build him up and "do for him, what no one else can do!" Will you join me in doing this for your husband? Watch for the posts that will begin on February 28th~
I realistically know that not everyone precious woman who may read this post has a husband that is on her team, or supportive or sacrificial for her. I do not take that lightly, trust me! I take very seriously the fact that there are many marriages struggling all around me and that is a very hard place to be, I have seen it. I understand the effects and the hardship, so please know that, while it is not always easy to be in the place you are, you are never alone. God still has you and is looking for you to be faithful.
Many have heard 1 Peter 3:1-4 that talks of the wife who can win her husband over by her quiet and chaste behavior. This doesn't work because we think it is a good idea, it works because we are out of the way! I have women very dear to me who walk in hard marriages, but they also have the sweetest countenance. It may not be rewarded here on earth, but it certainly will not be overlooked in heaven, by their dear Savior!
If you are in a tough place in your marriage I encourage you all the more to take this challenge to heart and see what God can do over the next 32 days, in your heart and in your husband's. Remember that all we do is for the glory of God and that makes it all worth it!
This challenge will also include an aspect for motherhood, which I will post about tomorrow!